Dieting

I'm starting another diet today.  Let's see!  That makes approximately 7,892 diets in my lifetime, give or take one or two.  I've tried pills, shakes, protein bars, low carbohydrate, counting calories, counting points, weighing, not weighing, counseling, meetings . . . and yes, I've tried to fake myself out by calling it a "live-it" instead of a "diet."  You see, I want to lose weight.  I want to be slim, trim and healthy, but here's the rub . . . I don't want to eat less.  When I eat less I feel deprived and tired.  I feel like I'm starving and all I can think about is EATING.  Of course, when I overeat, I feel bloated, uncomfortable, ashamed and worthless . . . but somehow those temporary sensations are worth it. Because I love food.  So, there you have it!

I think some people's brains are wired to eat uncontrollably.  I'm sure mine is.  I picture a cookie-monster-like creature that lives inside my head, constantly barraging my grey matter with lies:

"You know you want that piece of cake and it's not that big.  Go ahead and have a second helping. You can walk it off tomorrow.  Yes, broiled would be better, but fried tastes so good!  So what if you just had dinner.  A bedtime snack will help you sleep better."  

I have "fought the good fight," given it "the old college try," "battled my demons" again and again.  I have lost the same twenty pounds more times than I can count.  My closet has more sizes than the clothing department at Target. I don't think I can put myself through the agony of dieting--and failing--again.

But today is a new day!  It's a good day to check my attitude, adjust my thinking, forget my past failures and look to the future. I can do anything for one day at a time, right?

Yes! I can do this! I'll start first thing tomorrow!