The Greatest Gift

Yesterday I was sitting on the floor in our great room wrapping Christmas presents and listening to the King’s College Choir singing classic Christmas music. I had spent the morning shopping, then rushed home to change clothes and attend our neighborhood’s annual Christmas tea at the clubhouse which had been meticulously decked out in festive trimmings. Beside me, the tiny lights of our apartment-sized Christmas tree glowed, joining forces with multiple twinkling candles on the mantle above. Focused on how much shopping I still had to accomplish, suddenly I was struck with how far our Christmas traditions and celebrations have departed from that first Christmas in Bethlehem.

Not that there’s anything wrong with decorating, gift-giving, or gathering friends and family to enjoy food and fellowship. But when those aspects dominate our holiday celebrations, it’s not really about Christmas, is it?

Now that I’m retired from my demanding job as a church musician, I don’t feel quite as frantic about being ready in time for December twenty-fifth. But there’s still a sense of urgency surrounding the preparations: mail the cards, clean and decorate the house, shop for gifts and wrap them, attend concerts, plan special meals and gatherings, shop for groceries ... the list goes on and on until we want to shout “stop, slow down, there’s only so much one person can do!” I would add, “Take time to reflect on God’s gift to humanity, Jesus Christ.” 

God, the Father, is not the one pushing us to rush about, checking things off our to-do lists. Rather, we humans have turned Christmas into a competition to outdo each other. Maybe that’s why we’re called the human race. We even stretch our budgets to the breaking point, making retail merchants happy but causing ourselves more unnecessary stress.

What happened exactly that first Christmas in Bethlehem? “The Word became flesh.” God in the form of a baby, fully human, fully divine, came and dwelt among us, fulfilling the prophecy foretold hundreds of years before by Isaiah, Micah and others. More than our annual reenactment of Mary and Joseph gazing peacefully into a manger, surrounded by shepherds and animals, it was the greatest gift humanity has ever known. God’s desire to reveal His plan of love and harmony to the universe was so significant that He came and dwelt among us in the form of a humble peasant boy. Knowing His plan would include suffering and humiliating death, Jesus came to offer the ultimate gift of salvation, a gift that is free to all who accept it. Now, that’s a reason to celebrate!  

Cindy L. Freeman is the author of two award-winning short stories and three published novels: Unrevealed, The Dark Room and I Want to Go Home. Website: www.cindylfreeman.com; Facebook: Cindy Loomis Freeman. Her books are available from amazon.com or hightidepublications.com

What Aspect of Writing Do I Enjoy the Most?

Recently someone asked me what I enjoy most about writing. Since I like everything about writing, I had to think carefully to pinpoint one aspect. Finally, I recognized that, both in writing and in real-life relationships, I enjoy studying the psychology behind people's words and behavior.  

Why do people speak and behave as they do? For example, why are some people uncomfortable in social settings while other seem to fit in immediately? What factors contribute to personality traits like narcissism, hypersensitivity, or extreme shyness? Why are some people timid while others are assertive?

Most adults, at one time or another, have taken a personality test, whether Jung’s Typology, Myers Briggs Type Indicator or some other assessment. I found an online test that divides humans into sixteen types within four main categories: analysts, diplomats, sentinels, and explorers. To me, it seems to use different terminology to arrive at the same conclusions as Myers Briggs.

As an educator, I know that labeling children according to their behavior is potentially harmful. I see behavior as different from personality. Children are a work in progress. Young children’s personalities may be set by the time they are six, but their behaviors are fluid, and their influences are many. Take, for example, a child who bullies others. Unless there is a preexisting brain abnormality, s/he was not born with an intimidating personality. Most likely it was his/her negative experiences in early childhood that contributed to the need to torment others. Unless this behavior is explored and interventive measures are employed, the child will continue to get a pay-off for bullying. Chances are, s/he will become an adult who seeks to control others through intimidation.

When I created Hank, the abusive character in my novel, The Dark Room, I needed to give him a backstory explaining his behavior. Most batterers have, themselves, experienced abuse. Unless this cycle is broken early, chances are an abused child will grow up to repeat the behavior. For this reason, I gave Hank an abusive father.

Often abusers can “hold themselves together” until some traumatic incident triggers their need to oppress and control others. Hank’s behavior is triggered when he loses his precious, five-year-old son. Unequipped to handle the intense grief, he turns to alcohol and drugs. Now, less able to control his anger and aggression, he begins beating his wife, daughter and granddaughter. Seemingly, his behavior changes overnight.

While domestic violence is not a subject about which we like to think or read, it is an unfortunate fact that millions of women and children, and some men, suffer abuse at the hands of someone who claims to love them. How confusing for a victim! How intriguing for an author!  

Cindy L. Freeman is the author of two award-winning short stories, a novella, Diary in the Attic, and three published novels: Unrevealed, The Dark Room, and I Want to Go Home. Website: www.cindylfreeman.com; Facebook page: Cindy Loomis Freeman. Her books are available through amazon.com or hightidepublications.com