Recently someone asked me what I enjoy most about
writing. Since I like everything about writing, I had to think carefully to
pinpoint one aspect. Finally, I recognized that, both in writing and in real-life
relationships, I enjoy studying the psychology behind people's words and
behavior.
Why do people speak and behave as they do? For
example, why are some people uncomfortable in social settings while other seem
to fit in immediately? What factors contribute to personality traits like narcissism,
hypersensitivity, or extreme shyness? Why are some people timid while others
are assertive?
Most adults, at one time or another, have taken a
personality test, whether Jung’s Typology, Myers Briggs Type Indicator or some other
assessment. I found an online test that divides humans into sixteen types
within four main categories: analysts, diplomats, sentinels, and explorers. To
me, it seems to use different terminology to arrive at the same conclusions as Myers Briggs.
As an educator, I know that labeling children
according to their behavior is potentially harmful. I see behavior as different
from personality. Children are a work in progress. Young children’s
personalities may be set by the time they are six, but their behaviors are fluid,
and their influences are many. Take, for example, a child who bullies others. Unless
there is a preexisting brain abnormality, s/he was not born with an
intimidating personality. Most likely it was his/her negative experiences in
early childhood that contributed to the need to torment others. Unless this
behavior is explored and interventive measures are employed, the child will
continue to get a pay-off for bullying. Chances are, s/he will become an
adult who seeks to control others through intimidation.
When I created Hank, the abusive character in my novel, The Dark Room, I needed to give him a
backstory explaining his behavior. Most batterers have, themselves, experienced
abuse. Unless this cycle is broken early, chances are an abused child will grow
up to repeat the behavior. For this reason, I gave Hank an abusive father.
Often abusers can “hold themselves together” until
some traumatic incident triggers their need to oppress and control others. Hank’s
behavior is triggered when he loses his precious, five-year-old son. Unequipped
to handle the intense grief, he turns to alcohol and drugs. Now, less able to
control his anger and aggression, he begins beating his wife, daughter and
granddaughter. Seemingly, his behavior changes overnight.
While domestic violence is not a subject about which
we like to think or read, it is an unfortunate fact that millions of women and
children, and some men, suffer abuse at
the hands of someone who claims to love them. How confusing for a victim! How
intriguing for an author!
Cindy L. Freeman is the author of two award-winning
short stories, a novella, Diary in the
Attic, and three published novels: Unrevealed, The Dark
Room, and I Want to Go Home.
Website: www.cindylfreeman.com; Facebook page: Cindy Loomis Freeman.
Her books are available through amazon.com or hightidepublications.com
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